MITSFS meeting called to order, 1700 SST, Ed Keyes, President and Skinner, presiding; Kat Allen, Onseck, recording.
Motion: condemn the minutes for not saying what room the meeting was
held in. (5-260)
Passes by Skinnerial Decree
Discussion ensues about Kat breaking into the Spofford room next time.
Motion: condemn the other people for not believing the minutes
Motion: condemn and commend the minutes for being a fitting end to an Onseck's career
Motion: matrix vote
The Onseck whines, and is told she can declare someone Pentiumcomm.
Brian is made Pentiumcomm, but claims he has to compile Matlab first.
Andrew and Kat face off and get different determinants.
The meeting is entirely derailed attempting to calculate the matrix vote. A member tries and gets a negative answer.
``Except 4*2 is 8'' -BTS
The Determinant of the Matrix is 24
Kat calculated it correctly, because Matlab says so, so all motions pass. There is much rejoicing.
Motion: Everyone who got the determinant wrong should return their
Discussion with a member about overdue fees and whether it is cheaper for him to ``lose'' the books and replace them.
Discussion of max overdue fines, and what the maximum fine might have been.
The Onseck points out that she has never had a fine of any sort (keyholder or member), and that she is the only keyholder who can claim this.
Motion: Motion to fine the Onseck for impertinence
Fails for lack of a second.
Recap from last meeting: The reason it took so long for John to get back from recovering the dexes is because he stopped to read them.
Discussion of stupid square British books.
Discussion of digital slide rules.
Jamie suggests that we need to appoint someone to flushcomm, traditionally in charge of flushing all the toilets in the Institute at once in the thought that this would destroy the Institute's plumbing. This, however, might cause the Library to flood.
Discussion of The Great Tech Flood: No, shit, there we were, pinned down by a huge puddle of water, dripping out from beneath the door to the Tech Darkroom. We set up one inch-high dam of paper towels across the door, but the water kept coming. The keyholders were madly bailing, but the water kept coming. We set up a second dam near the desks, but the water kept coming. Then someone from The Tech noticed. There was much rejoicing.
Physplant came with their ``Washer-buffer squeegee machine'' and cleaned up after this, making the floors as clean as they had ever been. The Library blamed Natasha for bringing a flood with her as she visited.
Jaime reads through some old keyholder excuse sheets:
``Mea Culpa! Mea Culpa! Mea Maxima Culpa!''
Discussion on whether Catholics are allowed to burn Lutherans.
Discission on whether Latin is prohibited or required in Mass, and what would have happened if they'd gone directly from one to another.
``Big Red Cheese, or possibly Assistant to the Big Red Cheese'' -JM
Those in attendance demand that Jamie explain what Big Red Cheeses have to do with keyholders, which prompts Jamie to unlock secret chamber documents with wills from previous skinners. There are some keyholders discussed in these who are stilll keyholders.
There are more German Books coming.
``Because our collection is incomplete''-JFC
``There must be better foreign language stuff than Perry Rhodan in German'' -ED
We got the new Adam Roberts novel.
JM reports that someone found Malcom through the MITSFS minutes.
The picnic happened, there are several sets of pictures. ED may be able to replace his keyholder picture, but John likes it.
Timewarp to committee reports: AlohaLenscomm reports that Brian has moved up 18 inches.
This is because ``Former keyholder Dave Kern has gracefully voluntarily offered his resignation as required.'' -JM
JFC suggests that someone should colorize the TIF.
The Banannimal is put upright in the bucky ball. It has evolved. There is much rejoicing.
BTS reports that the dust on Banannimal has set up a civilization, and Yaroslav Blagozevic has written again.
He quotes from it, and it is amusing, but is not recorded here.
``If the rest of the books were two-dimensional, they would be much easier to store'' -JM
``A 50000 level deep tower of Hanoi'' -ED
Much discussion ensues about the apparently massless (or maybe not) books, which may or may not have infinite density, and might or might not collapse into one another.
``If our books were in a Black hole, we couldn't have any in German''
``Because black holes can't have any herr!''-Malcom
Albanian Motion: Malcom
Passes by Skinnerial Decree
Discussion about the Albanian Alphabet and its lack of W.
Discussion about former Queen/King Zoog, later determined to be a Queen.
Discussion in Albanian, which unfortunately the Onseck does not speak.
BTS reports that we do not have permission to view the Albanian slash. There is much rejoicing.
Discussion of the TIF, TIF-racing, and who is the Median.
Discussion about the sadness a keyholder feels when nobody comes to the library during their hours.
``The baby banannaimal is staring at me now'' -JFC
``It's saying `I've evolved. Have you?'''-JM
BTS suggests that marsupials are evidence that YWJH was a graduate student once, too.
JFC discusses comments in genetic code.
Motion fails 3-14-3+Spehn. There is much rejoicing.
Second Miller Motion
Motion to commend the banannimal for evolving
Motion not to have a matrix vote
This time, the Onseck alone deals with the Matrix, having proven herself in the last Matrix vote. The determinant is -270, so All Motions Fail.
Motion to commend the baby bananimal for staring at John
Meeting adjourned, 1730 SST.