MITSFS meeting called to order, 1700 SST, Margaret Gentile, Vice and pseudo-Skinner, presiding; Susan Born, pseudo-Onseck, recording.
Minutes read.
Motion to approve the minutes as being said, 5-1-buddhist cow thing + 0 + Spehn.
BING!
BING!
All the HAs have been bluebellcommed. BlueBellComm has no overflow.
Box of HAs to be hasslecommed has been hasslecommed. JM says these are things that have accumulated over many years.
Still as whiny as ever.
Books were moved, and shelves screwed onto other shelves.
It exists.
Motion to commend the chainsword passes by pseudo-Skinnerial decree.
Discussion of doubleheaded eagle on chainsword leads to discussion of doubleheaded eagles in European national emblems in general, which obviously was a result of Chernobyl, which hadn't happened yet.
Motion to declare the doubleheaded eagle as "noble, fearless, and incredibly indecisive" passes 9-2-0+Spehn.
Because nobody would vote chicken where eagles are concerned. The forces of evil cause twisted and mutated animals to emerge, which is why it's the symbol of some empire, not because Russians conquered the universe.
Chainsword may need more weight in the handle to balance it. Or more weight everywhere so MHG can't lift it.
Motion for society to acquire Really Large airmail envelope so we'll have something to open with the chainsword passes 11-0-2+Spehn.
Motion to hail the great ViceTelzeyToy passes 160-0-pi+Spehn. The good kind of pie.
Spiderman II is opening this week, it looks good.
Motion to commend Spiderman II for looking good chickens 3-0-5+Spehn.
BING!
The last cardboard guard on magazine shelving was put in today by ED so magazines can nestle comfortably without scraping against concrete or falling to their deaths. Maybe old high acid paper magazines should be on low shelves instead of high shelves so they don't get so hurt when they fall off? Yes, if there were low shelves. JM says that magazines will circulate up on top and down not on top so much and in the alley and to the slime-covered public.
MHG suggests a cleansing alcohol mist or airlock at the door to take care of the slime problem with the slime-covered public. JM suggests laminating the members. ARM points out that if we had the space for all this stuff, we'd use it for books.
MHG tries to hand off pseudo-Skinnerity to AC. He bings weakly, over which a duel nearly breaks out between MHG (with chainsword) and AC (with gavel). pseudo-Onseck feels under no obligation to explain this, as MHG herself declares, "I have no idea what just happened."
ps decree - motion passed commending JM for his wise observations about AC's excellence.
In Which it is Elucidated to All Concerned that the pseudo-Skinner's soul does not reside in the gavel, and therefore if MHG cuts his head off he will, indeed, die. The pseudo-Skinner considers this carefully.
ALGOL! (with rather unusual cry of Excelsior! from the hall)
Motion to provide alcohol to unfreeze members' brains passes 1-2-3+Spehn. Power goes to AC's head quickly, he gets drunk, doesn't know what he's saying. Don't blame him.
BING!
Canals. Has anyone asked "What's with that plank between two shelves that's very structurally unsound and should not have books hanging from the bottom?" No. C/PAs have probably enough space, JM decided things placed at their height probably don't need actual shelves, and you could put them up in the air, but not everywhere or you'd just lower the roof. The current plan is going out to the instrumentality at some point, as it has been Skinnerially At first there will only be canals between the hardcovers. Later there may be canals between hardcovers and exterior shelves, but these are unnecessary now. There will first be canals at either end, so there is a circle. Magazines on the interior ring, C/PAs on the exterior ring. Sometimes you will be surrounded by anthologies, sometimes flanked by anthologies on one side and magazines on the other. We can add more canals internally, which will give the magazines multiple loops. These will probably be popular magazines, which we and the members access more often. So you have loop of F&SF, loop of Asimov's, etc. Topological library filing system.
Now that we have canals, should we call the circulating room Mars? JM was thinking of Venice, of which these are the opposite. They are solid, not liquid; above you, not below you; an obstacle, instead of a means of transportation.
Suggestion to call them bridges and appoint a pontifex. Motion to beat Malcolm severely passes by skinnerial decree.
Roof is leading again. Two leaks by DA, one of which is new and coming through a light fixture; one in circulating which has been there for a while. A facilities guy came, turned off the light, and moved the light fixture. Maybe he fixed the leak.
CAC thanked ARM for reporting leaks, because now they are reporting building-related complaints.
You know how the fifth floor says to pick up packages in three days, or they'll send it back? They don't; we got one after a week. Delay in dealing with mail in our favor.
BING!
Motion to request MIT to build a thatch roof over the bookcases to protect the books when the other roof leaks, with amendment to divide the books into a fantasy and into a SF section to put thatched roof over fantasy and corrugated tin roof over SF, with AC separating the books (page by page if necessary), chickens by pseudo-Skinnerial decree.
A dumbstrucken silence falls over the room, but not for long.
JM suggests a roof that from some angles looks thatched, from some angles looks like a spaceship, and from other angles drives you mad. If we had this technology, we should apply it to Dean Benedict's office to subliminally convince him of things. Or drive him mad.
Why are tin roofs science-fictionish? Because they're shiny, and have that whole cheap 50s movie spaceship and robot thing going. Tin robots are vulnerable to oxidation, so they don't have hearts to avoid circulating blood. You could use them in oxygen-free environments. Five-yard penalty for excessive thinking called on the play.
Something is seconded and passes by pseudo-Skinnerial decree. He doesn't know what it was.
When in doubt, fuck it; when not in doubt, get in doubt fails by pseudo-Skinnerial decree. He didn't know it was from the Principia.
Do we have a collection of magazine articles? We have entire magazines of articles and stuff. Andrea is looking for library-suitable reprints of some article in Japan Echo. If someone gives us a magazine with a sufficiently science-fictionish article, we will keep the magazine in its entirety.
Motion to move the meeting for moving or not moving or something trails off in search of a better one.
Motion to condemn the Skinner and Telzey for choosing to experiment with coming to the meeting from work via dragons that feed on blueberries and apples and raspberries and go hunting wolves and romping through banana-scented forests while chasing small pigs passes by pseudo-Skinnerial decree.
Meeting adjourned, 18 minus 15 SST.